Having had this on a shelf for months it was a film that I was adamant I would hate. I was kind of wrong. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not a good movie. Some of the actors look like they really aren’t interested in what’s going on. The soundtrack is really cheesy, obviously calling back to old 80′s buddy cop movies, but it comes off as a little weird, and almost distracted among the modern backdrop of the film. The action is particularly explosive and the comedy isn’t rip-roaringly funny, but somehow I found myself getting some enjoyment out of Cop Out. Being a Kevin Smith film, there are no punches pulled on dialogue and while some of the script doesn’t really gel, there are a couple one-liners and a couple jokes which got a genuine laugh out of me. The whole thing would have been much more enjoyable though if Tracy Morgan’s character could keep quiet for two seconds. Here’s a good example of how this movie goes (albeit with edited dialogue):

The obvious improvements in graphics and animations are there, and the gun-play feels tighter and generally more refined, but the way this sequel sets out the action is really great. The set-pieces are bigger, more explosive and just generally more interesting. Whereas the first game got a little dull at times, Gears 2 really streamlines the action and keeps it feeling fresh. While I certainly got tired of the long stretch of time you spend underground, the environments vary enough that it really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Having played a lot of awful third person shooters, it’s really refreshing to go into Gears 2 and find that there’s a reason that it remains one of the high benchmarks of the genre.

Super Size Me is a film I watched many years ago and took some interesting stuff from. Several years on, and having watched the whole thing instead of the last two-thirds on TV, there’s a lot wrong with it. Throughout the whole thing I felt the film has a very specific tone, and really has no interest in throwing a balanced argument. It’s always a bad sign when your documentary’s facts… aren’t always facts. There’s a *whole* lot of presumptions and assumptions made throughout this film, even getting as far as the whole premise of the documentary. There’s a lot of stuff which is pure anecdote, and the whole thing gets a little pretentious far too often to make an enjoyable film. It would have made much better viewing to actually focus on his month of fast food, especially with regard to his food and exercise before the experiment, and as @Andsy77 pointed out on Twitter, the actual list and nutritional content of the food he ate throughout. It all feels a little incoherent, stumbling from topic to topic when with a little more focus (and possibly a little less condescending attitude) it could have been a much more informative and entertaining watch.

Three Kings is a really weird movie. It pulls in so many different directions that it’s really difficult to know how to take it. In parts it’s got a lot of dark humour. In other parts it is a deeply serious and fairly brutal war movie. The combination of Mark Wahlberg, George Clooney and Ice Cube is actually a really good mix, with each holding their part of the bargain. While in most situations a movie this segmented might be a train-wreck, but Three Kings is incredibly interesting and more importantly completely watchable. Some of the visual style has dated, especially some of the weird slow motion effects, but honestly it’s nothing particularly distracting. At times it wants you to feel uncomfortable and it succeeds, but generally it’s just a well made film with some much-needed character. While there are most likely films which better represent the horrors of war, Three Kings is a fantastic movie which should be on anyone’s ‘to watch’ list.

I don’t want to write anything about this movie. Don’t get me wrong, I think people should see it, I just don’t know what I can say to get people to watch it. This is by far the most PREPOSTEROUS movie I’ve seen this side of Enemy of the State, and the fact it remains deadly serious throughout is almost inspirational. I’m not really sure how this movie got made, and I’m totally confused on how a Shia LeBeouf fronted action movie so full of big brother surveillance I’m surprised it didn’t come with a tin-foil hat actually turned out good. No, it’s not great, but it’s a good ‘watch once’ sort of movie. Just be ready for INSANITY. And some pretty mushy CG. Did I mention the fact this film is INSANE?

Also, the ending. Literally follows the same concept as an episode of South Park I saw once. I won’t spoil it, but anyone who’s seen Eagle Eye will know exactly what I mean.

I really didn’t know what to expect from The Animatrix. 9 short stories, animated by different teams telling stories on the fringe of The Matrix universe. It’s a cool idea, but one which already sounded like a bit of a cash grab. It’s kind of a shame that the whole thing is wildly inconsistant.

I’ll start off by saying that I enjoyed a couple of the stories towards the end, with ‘Beyond’ and ‘A Detective Story’ being interesting pieces of film with some really good-looking animation. The problem was that the other hour was fairly dull in comparison. A lot of it seems to edge towards being animation for the sake of it rather than telling a coherent narrative. Not especially bad, but some of the stories are so vague and inconsequential that I was starting to wonder if some of them have a point at all. When the first story literally starts with a man and woman in the training dojo, fighting with swords and cutting off various layers of clothing in the process, followed by a sequence of really odd close-ups (of which one is in the header), you have to question whether there’s a meaning or if it was all done to look pretty instead.

The animation varies in quality. A lot of the 4C Studio work looks really good, and I’d say it’s the highlight of the package. The Square Enix segment is fairly well animated for the time, and although it looks dated by today’s standards, it still looks interesting. Overall it’s a very strange set of movies with a lot of psychedelic visualisers, people in underwear, and a whole lot of Matrix. As a person who’s watched only a couple of animés, it’s not like I have a huge cache of references to pull from in comparison, but as a generally enjoy of movies, this one isn’t essential.

I’ve owned Watchmen quite some time, bought when it was super cheap in a sale online, and I figured I’d get around to watching it at some point. Then a year passed and it still remained on the shelf, making it a prime example of why I’m doing this stupid bag. It’s also most likely the longest film in the bag, clocking in at a frankly alarming 155 minutes. I try not to pre-judge anything I watch but when you hand me a film long enough to literally make two films, it’s not a step in a good direction.

I suppose the most positive thing to say is that I stuck with it in one sitting. Obviously with a film this long there is a lot of down time, with characters literally delivering paragraphs of dialogue. Sometimes it really does feel like there is too much content to cover, and too many characters to address that the film bogs down with a lot of back story, making the films methodical pace somewhat less bearable at times. The film seems at it’s best when it’s dark and moody, with most of the action staying pretty intense. The outright abuse of slow-motion and CG is a little much, especially when this film is only two years old and already some of it’s effects are starting to age.

It’s a weird film to actually talk about, since I felt it was too flabby and not particularly well done, but for every scene I was groaning at the cliché dialogue, the cheesy music and the abusive slow-motion, there was another scene which was interesting, atmospheric and entertaining. It’s not going to be for everyone, but if you’re unsure, it’s worth a look if you have an evening free.